Thursday, July 16, 2009

Husband and Wife Relationship

I've been into a relationship that lasted for more or less 15 years of my adult life. There's a lot to tell about all those years that I've experienced. But then, my writing this post is not about those years. You see I've never been into what they say "blessed partnership". I have never been into any civil or church wedding. But even if I'm not married, I still want to share my views and knowledge of what really goes on in that so called partnership between husbands and wives.

First, what do you think are the roles of husbands and wives? After getting vows of "Till death do us part", the man and woman start to live their lives together. And hopefully, starts having a child or two that they thought would make their marriage more binding. And so they thought so. Relationship of a husband and wife should not be focused on the children they want to raise. They should first start on making their relationship grow more as days, months, and years pass them by. When you try to ask other couples, they would simply answer that "Oh of course, we're ok and we have no problems at all". But when you know them personally, you can see right through their eyes that they are not okay at all. The problem lies to the fact that they are both telling themselves that they're okay. When in fact they are not at all okay. The husband usually tells his friend that there's something wrong with his wife. That she is not cleaning the house the way he wanted it to be cleaned, wife doesn't cook much these days because she's too busy working late in the office. And the worst thing he is complaining about is that his wife doesn't make love to him as often as he wants to. The husband would simply tell his friend that "She is not the woman I married years ago". Now, if the wife's neighbor or her office mate would ask her what's troubling her, she would tell him or her that her husband is never around anymore than when they were still starting to play the role of husband and wife. The wife complains of things like "he's always out with his friends!" Or "my husband doesn't talk to me anymore." Sounds familiar to almost all those couples I've met personally. And almost all of them found themselves out of their relationships.
Now, there are also those husbands and wives who choose to still live in one roof. And some of them just shrugged and let those problems wait to just fade away in time. Do you think trust between them still exist? I don't think that is possible at their stage now. And after everything that they've experienced, all their issues unsolved will surely start to lessen their chance of becoming a real and contented couple. Relationships between couples mainly start and end with love, respect, and trust. Without these essentials, they are bound to end eventually.

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