Monday, February 21, 2011

Loving Someone So Much

I was crying when I've started this post. Hopefully, by the time I pour out whatever things going in and out of mind, I will feel a lot better and it my tears will just go away. Well, at least for a while just to be able to think clearly about what I really want to do with my life. This post is not intended to hurt or make other people feel guilty about anything. I just really need to do this for myself. If ever you want to react about this, kindly just keep it to yourself. Believe me; it will not help me in any way if you will react or not. This is purely for my peace of mind.
Shocked and heartbroken for more than a week now but still pain is stabbing right through my heart. I'm just wishing it will be over much sooner. My body ached for the love I thought would last me a life time. But I was just imagining all these from the start. It hurts more to realize that you were just the only one feeling that way. Letting go now is just impossible for me to do right now, not now. My only option for now is to face tomorrow and hoping I will have the courage to just let go of him. 
Loving someone so much doesn't assure you that he will love you the same level that you do. But what is really painful is he made me believe that there is forever for us. And that belief that I hold in my heart still hopes unconsciously. I know I am fooling myself when I see the truth he is revealing to me but still looking the other way around. I just hope that after all of these, I can still love the way I did and do now.